About the Author
A slow-growing brain tumor was found in Adam when he was nine years old. Brain surgery was performed and the tumor was removed. He lost his equilibrium. He relearned how to walk. After surgery he developed double vision, and was given eye surgery. After some time the doctors discovered that his body was not growing as needed. He gave himself daily shots and was given monthly shots to help him grow. These shots were required for several years.
The tumor grew back by sophomore year in high school. By this time, Adam was on medication to keep him psychologically stable. Learning about the recurrence of his brain tumor brought many confusing thoughts and emotions. He learned to channel his thoughts into writing, some in the form of poetry. He had wanted to be done with life before. The possibility that the tumor was going to end things brought a very unhealthy kind of hope. Writing became his survival.
Brain surgery was undertaken again, and the tumor was again removed. After surgery, Adam’s blood pressure increased to a degree that his parents, watching the monitor, felt that they were going to lose him. Sometime after blood thinners had been administered and would have taken effect, pressure began to come down. Adam awoke to a life he didn’t want.
Years later, after follow-up radiation treatment had long past been completed and he was deemed relatively stable, Adam came to the decision to take himself off his medication, feeling that it was what God wanted. During the months following, Adam lost his ability to function. He forgot when he was supposed to eat. He didn’t remember if he had showered ten minutes before, or talked with the person he had planned to that morning, or put on yesterday’s clothes instead of today’s. He often forgot how he had come to be in the place he was and wondered if he had nearly been run over while crossing a street. Eventually he could not communicate. Sometime after he was completely off medication, Adam was placed in the hospital, in a closed psychiatric ward. Much of the emotional foundation for the writing in this work was laid down during and soon after his hospital stays. The most important thing to him through all of it, the biggest takeaway, is what Adam sees as the catalyst to success.
When you are knocked down, recognize the beauty and the worth in yourself, and get back up.